看完daria最后一集，电视电影“Is it college yet?”，我情绪实在太激动没办法不写一篇接近影评类的东西了。
There are lots and lots and lots of films and books about teenage-hood. There always were and probably always will be. But things (abominations is more the word for it, actually..- -) like High School Musical only make life seem even more fatally depressing than usual after a viewing. The predictable fairytale endings and ［I］chirpiness［/I］ of it all is enough to make me want to slit my wrists in a tank filled with starving sharks. In "real" life, the cute guy that sits next to you in class doesn't share with you a common passion for Haruki Murakami. Nor does he listen to much else other than Tupac. Nor can he refrain from falling asleep when watching films that don't include more than 90 minutes of bloodshed and gore. Nor -- and this point is crucial -- does he like you. Also note that bursting into song in the middle of an emptied school may be somewhat fun, but under no circumstances will a symphony strike up behind you, perfectly aware of what song you're singing and happening to know what exactly the accompaniment should sound like.
Not that Daria is entirely realistic either.
I wish I had my own Jane Lane, and Trent, and Tom. I wish that being truthful and somewhat not as vapid (hopefully I'm not imaging this. xD) as most of the population of my high school would afford me some amazing insight about myself every once in a while. I wish that my parents actually DO secretly understand me. I wish that the people I find pretentious are, in fact, really pretentious (instead what I think sometimes -- that I'm just not into obscure music/movies/art/whatever enough to appreciate their stupid pretentious talk. So THERE)...etc etc
These are but minor points, though, compared to what Daria is, overall. This is going to make me cringe, in a few years if not tomorrow..but Daria is the one thing that for sure guarentees the teenage outcast a sudden surge of warmth to the bosom and a striking realization of "Hey, perhaps I'm not the only one!!". Having her word, quite often, express almost exactly how I feel about certain aspects of my life gives me hope that perhaps this world isn't a disgusting "network" of "connections" and selfishness and injustice and stupidity and ignorance. I mean, she's produced by these producers right? Even people in the TV business are cool! All hope is not lost! Maybe I'll go to college and find some Jane Lanes of my own! Maybe even a Trent/Tom mash-up that will be the love of my life (okay I'm going too far and hoping too much here. But one can always imagine. Cuz Spongebob said so. So there.)! Maybe I WON'T be a loner for the rest of my life. Maybe next time I'm feeling really sad and alone, W won't be the only one I can call. Maybe I'll actually write something decent one day. Maybe I AM going to find something I'm really talented in. Maybe I'll find something I want to do for the rest of my life ('kay, fine, just something I don't abhor and detest myself for doing everyday. Orz). Maybe I'll be really content one day. At least that's how she makes me feel. - -||. That this teenage thing really won't last forever. That there ARE kindred souls out there (you know what Anne Shirley? I hate you. I've searching for kindred souls since grade 4. All because of you. And so far I've only found one. And she's just as/almost as/maybe even more weird than me. Which I suppose is good. Okay I've just lost my point. - -).
［Gosh, all this emotion (mostly hopefulness and optimism) is really making me sick. I don't even need tomorrow to make me cringe. - -］
Sometimes I think (okay, OFTEN I THINK) that maybe I'm actually trying really hard to make myself "weird" and "different". Perhaps I'm not. Maybe, maybe probably, I'm just as mundane and boring as the next person. I'm not "destined for something great". I WON'T create anything worthwhile in my life. I won't ever become really really well-read and knowledgeable about everything. My converstional skills will remain forever awkward and awkward and awkward..
But one can always hope. xD
Maybe shutting myself in all day playing Princess Maker 3/reading books/cramming in world history/doing a Daria marathon for the first time in my life from 7 to 1 isn't such a good idea for a lass of my tender age (harhar, that was a joke. Laugh. - - Or something.)..But after watching Daria graduate high school (yes, wathcing a cartoon character graduate from a fictional learning institution often leads me to euphoric moments like this. It's true.), for some odd and inexplicable reason, I think everything will turn out to be okay.
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