不是影评，是PTA的八卦，原文发布在我的个人微信公众号：franknows
昨晚在写我大学同学Mark Rodakowski的悼文，写了一半写不下去了，上网随意翻了几段视频，结果无意间听到了一条导演PTA将近一个半小时的录音。这段对话来自于他12年参加的一场由Writers Guild Foundation举办的座谈会，大部分内容聊的是PTA自编自导的电影作品The Master（《大师》，12年上映的作品）；
在听这段录音前我还没有看过任何一部PTA的作品，听完之后我看了There Will Be Blood(《血色将至》)，很受震撼，又挖了许多PTA的采访视频来看，于是看到了Mike Figgis在98年对他的电影Boogie Nights（《不羁之夜》）的采访，听他聊了将近半个小时的色情电影和一些八卦。
PTA是好莱坞出名的作家导演，他的知名作品基本上是由自己编剧（例如Magnolia，还有Boogie Nights等）。有人说，如果美国电影界需要一张诺亚方舟的船票，他们会把这个机会留给PTA。
听PTA说话前分享一点他的感情史，他的前女友是Fiona Apple，推荐一首她的好歌——Hard Knife，这首歌的MV导演就是PTA。他的现任太太是我最喜欢的喜剧演员之一Maya Rudolph，每次吃饭我最喜欢做的事，就是点开SNL的视频看Maya出神入化的喜剧表演。
不过今天的重点是PTA。在这两只视频中，分别有几段内容非常吸引我，在这里摘录翻译供读者参考。原内容都比较长，就不全部翻译了，感兴趣的人请私信我发链接。
以下是我翻译的录音内容(附上英文速记)。
保罗·托马斯·安德森在《对话好莱坞》
1998年8月27日 洛杉矶
PTA谈论说自己从小就喜欢看色情片——
我17岁的时候写了自己的第一部电影叫《大炮王迪哥传》，我用录像带把她拍了出来，表现形式有点儿类似于《西力传》，《摇滚万万岁》那种感觉（我是这两部电影的忠实粉丝），那种虚构纪录片。
我那时候才17岁，特别沉迷于观看色情影片，从一个年轻躁动的男孩儿的角度去看，也从一个电影导演的角度去看…那时候我就特别想拍电影，我看了好多烂片，但是看着看着你觉得好像这些烂片也给你带来了灵感。那时候我还住在圣费尔南多，那地方就是出产情色片的首都，我上高中的地方四周就有很多工厂，你看到这些工厂有的上面挂着巨大的标识，而有的却什么标识都没有，可是门口却听着好多豪华轿车，然后你就纳闷儿“那里面到底TMD在搞什么名堂？”——当时那里面就是拍色情片的地方。
When I was 17 I wrote a short film called The Dirk Diggler Story…and actually shot it on video tape and it was like…it had like a Zelig/Spinal Tap kind format. This fictional documentary you know..I was a Zelig fan, a Spinal Tap fan, and I was also 17 years old so I was completely immersed in watching porno…in a kind of horny young boy way but also in like a filmmaker way…like I wanted to make movies and here were these terrible movies but I also kind of got off on them and they were so goofy and bad you know…so sort of all those things were kind of…and I lived in the valley too, in the San Fernando Valley which is the capitol of porn production…so it was always kind of peripherally around me there was a warehouse near where I went to high school, that had…here would be a portion of the warehouse that had some signage you know then there to be another one with a big sign and then just like a stretch of warehouse that had no signage at all but ton of like expensive cars parking in front so like what the fuck is going on inside that one with no sign you know. It’s clear they are making porno movies.
PTA聊情色电影——
（关于色情电影）可聊的简直太多了，我觉得情色电影完全可以成为一个正规的影像派别。像我看过的约翰·福尔摩斯主演的系列，（这个系列的）名字叫《约翰尼·瓦德》，福尔摩斯在里面扮演一个性格不羁，却深不见底的侦探，那个角色有点儿亨弗莱·鲍嘉的感觉，也有点儿詹姆斯·邦德的影子，还有点儿山姆·斯派德的味道（Sam Spade是达希尔·哈米特小说《马耳他之鹰》中虚构的侦探角色）…如果你真的要研究这个片子的叙事结构，那么你会发现她本质上是个凶杀片，对吧，但同时她又是个小黄片，所以就特别引人入胜。这种吸引力让你不断地猜想“接下来会发生什么？”，或者“我要看你把导火线扑灭！”那种感觉非常刺激。那种色情片真正让人觉得特别有意思的地方，在于她提供了一个特别合理的情境，这种情境让性爱的发生变得很真实，很自然。
如果你单纯地只是从男孩子的荷尔蒙角度去观看这个片子的话也有的可说。你在看的时候会打心眼儿里觉得“哇，这个妞儿可真漂亮！”，你不会看到一对巨大的假胸，不会看到完美无缺的腹肌，那些东西就特别不真实，你会脱离那个真实的情境。你看着看着，就会觉得自己好像在看一部科幻悬疑片，你看到那个女孩儿的屁股上有块儿斑，你看到她有小肚子，那么自然，那么真实。那些男演员也是一样的，你看看今天色情片里的男演员就一点儿魅力也没有，你不会像当初那样打内心里渴望看到这些男人和女人做爱，他们假得就和机器人一样。
我们今天看的色情片，如果真要去研究演技的话，我甚至都不要去纠结他们台词讲得如何，你就看他们的身体，好像是被精雕细琢，追求极致完美的那个样子，就特别虚伪，你不会觉得那是可信的，相反，他们总让你感到抽离，感到那和现实生活一点儿关系都没有。就好像在看外星人一样。但是你看《约翰尼·瓦德》这个系列，她之所以让你感同身受，也是因为她的幽默感，她不认为自己真的是在拍一部严肃的电影，有的地方可能让你觉得特别可笑，但你并不是在嘲笑她，而是和影片本身一起心领神会地笑。可约翰·福尔摩斯又是一个特别优秀的演员，他的表演又总是那么自然，他的那些性爱，根本不是做给镜头看的，是做给那个情境的。当今的色情片里面许多演员特别喜欢抱怨的一件事，就是那个体味，那个动作，与他们而言根本不自然，他们是做给镜头看的。70年代的情色片，是让镜头自己去观察，自己去体会，自己去琢磨这个时刻要不要凑近一点，抓拍那些有料、性感的特写。如今的色情片是去配合镜头，硬塞给观众，你们要看这个体味，这个画面…
其实我觉得色情片本质的意义，是在于能不能让你硬起来（而不是这些虚假的东西）。
oh yeah I mean I there's so much to talk about here…because porno movies they could be a genre…yeah you know and they should be a genre…you know like um I put you this way, there's a whole series of John Holmes movies and they're called like the Johnny Wad and it was this character he created where he was this suave, sophisticated detective, it's a lot like the Brock lander stuff Dirk Diggler creates. It's sort of well modeled after that, and he is this kind of Humphrey Bogart detective and he's a little bit James Bond, a little bit Sam Spade, you know…and just think about that structure there…essentially murder mysteries right? but they're also fuck films so you're on the hook, and this sort of just…it's just pure story and you're just pure “what's gonna happen next? I want to see you fucking defuse the bomb!” it's exciting. It's like well-made…well they don't really pull…they pull that off because they're actually sexy, because they're on a film and I certainly…just it helps that the girls are on at least a natural…you know…
I mean if you're looking at as a pure sort of hormone boy way you're like…sort of like my hormones go towards like “oh she's pretty!” No, she doesn't have huge enormous fake tits and this flat washboard stomach that somehow doesn't feel real to me. It's like watching science fiction, I mean it's a sci-fi movie at that point, you know…there's this girl like there's like a little zit on her butt you know…what I mean…she's got a little tummy, you know what I mean…or tits aren't out to here and you're sort of watching…so natural and the same thing with the guys it's kind of like the guys are not appealing in porno today, yes, and I'll be the first to say yeah that guy is sexy looking, or I want to see him fuck, but there's this fucking robot…you know…
So if you start with the acting and not even just the acting of the dialogue just sort of physically looking at these people who are just chiseled to perfection, there's nothing you can relate to you, instantly it doesn't make sense to you. It's watching space aliens…with the Johnny Wad stuff it's pretty…it's pulled off because it also has a sense of humor about itself…boy it's really funny to laugh at, but it's also really funny to laugh with…you know. When it knows it knows, it's not taking itself too seriously and it does a good job…John Holmes is quite an actor he's really natural you know…but the main thing is that a lot of the sex doesn't happen for the camera…and that's the thing…that is what most porn actors complain about is that in every position in porno is completely uncomfortable…because it's completely unnatural it's for the cameras…like having an actor like…can you cheat a little bit this way?...acting and sex scenes in the 70s we're much more sort of let the camera figure it out…so the cameras a bit more sort of handheld and a little bit more renegade and trying to get into the spot to get the good juicy close-ups…they want to get some help comes out feeling more sexy and natural…but nowadays you rent the porno movie as just their enduring sort of contortions and positions that are clearly guided towards the camera…but you don't make a fucking bit of sense or and don't come off as sexual anyway…you know I mean the goal of a porno movie I think should be to give you a boner.
这一段的内容比较长，我只截取了前面的部分内容，后面PTA更深入地聊了聊情色电影从60年代以来的进化，以及他对情色电影在镜头语言风格化上也许能够越来越接近传统意义上的“正统”叙事电影的设想。然后紧接着他说了这么一段——
我曾经举过一个例子，你有没有想过，如果我们能看看阿甘和罗宾上床的戏该多有趣（他说的正是《阿甘正传》）？罗宾·怀特饰演的那个角色，在电影最后不是生了个小孩儿吗，我觉得要是能看看阿甘是怎么和罗宾做爱的，那该多性感。我觉得阿甘是个特别棒的角色，但显然我并不是说我硬要看汤姆·汉克斯和罗宾上床，看胸啊这些…我是说，想要丰富全面地了解这样一个有趣的角色，最棒的方式就是看他如何做爱，看他如何躺在床上抚摸他的另一半，我觉得那个瞬间能告诉我们许多关于这个人物的故事。
One example I've used before, is it's not sort of doing it to be slashes or anything…like that it's saying like how interesting would have been to see Forrest Gump and Robin Wright…you know, and that Robin Wright character make that baby that we see at the end…that's sexy how does Forrest Gump have sex and I mean…that's a great character…I think yeah and it's not trying to sort of just give you a boner to show you Tom Hanks and Robin Wright you know, see your tits in bed…it's what to be more sort of human or what could be more of a like revelation of a character than watching them have sex, and I mean that says a lot about someone I think is how they sort of touch another person in bed.
这一段是PTA的小吐槽，和小反省——
我想起有一个说法——“导演手中永远没有定剪，只有放映师才有”。可影院真的都太TMD操蛋了，所有这些美国的影院都是。THX认证（THX认证是卢卡斯影业制定的对电影、电影播放设备、电影播放环境等的认证标准）就是一场骗局，THX认证所能代表的一切，就是乔治卢卡斯给你开了个证明，告诉你这个片子通过了THX认证资格，所以感觉你拿出去会显得比较威风，但事实上根本就是一坨屎。更别说那些放映师了，你花了那么久的力气去拍电影，去确保每个镜头看上去都是完美无缺的（言外之意就是最后都被放映规格给毁了）…
不过我必须承认，当我没那么心高气傲的时候，我也会想…就比如《不羁之夜》（Boogie Nights，PTA的经典代表作之一）上映差不多4到5个月的时候，我和我女朋友有一天在圣塔莫尼卡第三街路过影院的时候，我忽然拉着她说要进去看看我拍的这部电影。结果一进去才发现，他们用的是富士胶片（注：这个是有原因的，新线影业，也就是《不羁之夜》的制作方，在2000年前后正在和富士合作），太操蛋了，音效也是一团糟。我当时就慌了，后来我慢慢冷静下来，因为那个时候电影已经上映很久了，我变得控制欲没那么强，我质问我自己：如果我拍的作品没办法用富士胶片来放，甚至连一条单声道音轨都听起来那么糟糕，那我到底有没有尽到一个导演应尽的责任？
即便是操蛋的富士胶片，并不意味着电影本身就不能看了，更不应该让整个故事都无法讲下去，我到底想做一个什么样的导演？我想要做那个只能用柯达胶片放映，要求每一个细节都完美无缺的导演；还是那个可以笑着对别人说：“我知道这电影看起来像坨屎，但你还是得承认你喜欢看，对吧？”的人？
This sort of makes me think of this issue of…the concept that no director has the final cut, the projectionist has the final cut…which I mean theaters are so fucked…every theater in America…I mean this THX is the biggest scam going…it’s like THX doesn’t mean anything you know, THX means that George Lucas gets a check to say…to write for some theatre that “we are THX approved” so it sounds good but it’s bullshit. Not to mention all the projectors, you know, you spend all this time you want it to look right and everything else.
But I gotta say, that when I come down my high horse a little bit, I want to…Like my girlfriend and I, this was 4 or 5 months after the Boogie Night came out, I just walking down the theater on the Third Street Promenade you know, and I was like Let’s go in and look at it. And there was this terrible Fuji print…It just sounds fucking terrible, and I was kinda freaking out…but it was long after this movie was finished that I started to calm down a bit and I stopped controlling every little element…I said: If I can’t enjoy this bad Fuji print…not even sort of good mono kind of soundtrack that’s playing here, have I done my job? In terms of making the movie.
This movie should be able to come off, the story should be able to work…with a fucking Fuji print or it’s not even barely mono you know. What do I do here? Which guy do I wanna be? Do I wanna be the guy that has a fucking Kodak print in here and it’s precise and perfect and that’s the only way I can work? Or do I wanna be the guy goes “yeah it looks kinda shit, but you like it do you?”.
PTA和昆汀在一起——
前几天我和昆汀在一块儿，我俩在一起看他以前拍过的作品的胶片，正好看到一卷《落水狗》的16毫米胶片，我猜他们做16毫米的胶片主要是给在监狱放映的时候用，我那时候看到了想，要是我有一部作品也能做一卷16毫米的该多好。
总之，他是用35mm的规格拍摄的这部影片，但是这卷胶片是1.33:1的16mm胶片，我刚开始还说我很想看看这个投映出来是什么效果，结果我发现这卷影片根本没有对长宽比进行缩放，然后我说：“大哥，你不会真的要用这卷16mm来看你的宽屏电影吧？”结果昆汀说：“当然要看，好看极了！”
（注：PTA在导演圈里是出了名的技术派，他比许多导演更讲究摄影技术和画面比例——粗略而言，昆汀的《落水狗》是用super 35mm拍摄的，是符合当时美国标准的放映长宽比，当将之缩放到16mm胶片——16mm通常用于电视荧幕传送，并非用于投映——因为长宽比的收紧，如果没有进行缩放的话，原本的画面就会被切掉一圈。并且据PTA说，当时昆汀的这卷16mm画面全是锁死的，也就是很粗暴地把所有画面的外围都切掉了，而并不是保留最重要的画面部分）
我怀着无比激动的心情看了这部影片，那画面看起来简直像屎一样，但同时又觉得很新鲜，简直像是在看另外一部全新的电影，好像一个学生用同样的卡司阵容对照着原片翻拍了一部一模一样的《落水狗》。
I was actually with Quentin Tarantino the other night and we were sort of watched going through his prints or watching some prints and stuff, and he had a Reservoir Dog 16-millimeter print as I guess they make them…they make some 16 prints for like prisons and stuff now you know…and makes me want to get one of my movie you know…anyway.
He shot at super 35 scope, but this was 133 16 print and I was like “Quentin you’re not really going to watch this!” and let’s put it on, I want to see what it looks like you know. And then I realized it wasn’t scoped, and I said you’re not gonna watch your widescreen movie and 133, and he was like “no no no it would be great!”
I wanted to start up it was so kind of exciting because it had that kind of shitty…it didn’t pan and scan it was locked off you know…and it was kind of exciting cause it was 16 and it felt like a different movie, it felt like a student film has done shot-for-shot Reservoir Dogs with the same cast!
保罗·托马斯·安德森在《作者谈写作》
2012年11月8日
这一段是F.X.Feeney在和PTA聊Punch Drunk Love里他为Adam Sandler创作的角色，Feeney问他是否在创作剧本前有一个既定的主题——
“如果我脑袋中浮现了一个既定的主题，那种感觉真的非常糟糕…那样的话你会意识到你自己正在写作，你开始对一个点子紧追不舍，那是写作过程中于我而言最痛苦的感受。
我想起我曾经创作过两个角色，一个性格相当活泛，另一个的创作灵感来源于L.Ron Hubbard（L·罗恩·霍伯特，美国作家，科学教的创始人是，也是电影《大师》的原型人物），当我硬要把这些想法放在一起，把这两个角色捆绑在一起时，那种感觉就不太对劲，因为这两个角色感觉很像是同一个人。一般而言，如果要提升作品水平，最好能创作两个截然不同的角色，这样一来，就会对（读者）产生更强烈的吸引力…
…（省略一段）不过总而言之，最棒的境界，是当思路从你体内自然涌出，让他们指引你如何继续创作下去。
我记得曾经我读过John O’Hara（约翰·奥哈拉，美国作家）写的一篇题为《一桶血》的短篇故事，它讲的是关于一个刚刚做了阑尾切除手术的男人的事，开篇有一段非常精彩的对白，发生在他在医院醒来后和一位医生间的对话。我读完后就把这段对话用剧本的格式打了下来。
每当你（在写作的过程中）感到厌倦，或你觉得无事可做时，最好的练习方式就是把别人写过的话敲出来。你把他们打出来，然后仔细品味，瞧瞧你在这个过程中是否能获得一些灵感和启发，让你自己的故事能够继续下去。你希望不断发掘你角色中的那些要素，让他们开始跃然纸上，开始和你对话，和你交流，这听起来可能有点玄乎，但最好的情况，是你，作为一个作者，能够在某个时候彻底淡出、消失，让你心里的思绪，笔下的内容代替你完成创作…”
If I ever have a theme in mind…usually it was just the worst…
Then you feel yourself, you feel yourself writing, there’s nothing worse than that feeling of kind of chasing after a theme, I mean that’s always like writing and it’s worse for me…the best things kind of become something and you’re just happy it’s there…
I think I had a character, it was larger-than-life character and the other was an inspiration from L.Ron Hubbard and I didn’t…you know…all these different things I was sort of dragging from and had the two of them together which never seemed ideal just because they were actually kind of quite similar…you know…normally I think you are supposed to…the better way to go, in terms of better writing, is to have two characters that are more opposite…so there’s more attraction and stuff…
…Ultimately if things are coming out of you they are gonna guide you on how they gonna go
I remember at a certain point reading a great story called ‘bucket of blood’…john o’hara wrote a great story about a fella…he wakes up in a hospital and he’s having this great conversation with a doctor…he just had his appendix removed because his appendix burst on this train and he doesn’t know (because he’s wasted) where he was
It’s just a great conversation at the beginning between a doctor and this patient…and I started to transcribe and just wrote it down on script form. You got bored you got nothing to do there’s no better exercise than write somebody’s words down…just type out and see how it looks just to get you inspired again and get moving…You just start finding pieces of them, you hope they start to talk to you…talk back at you, it’s a weird kind of séance but you hope you are not there at a certain point, that they are just doing the work for you
这一段是PTA讲调查，资料搜集对于创作的意义——
我觉得于我而言，最难的是如何停止资料搜集的过程，然后真正开始进行写作。比如，每次我说：“我要开始写剧本了”，其实都是在对老婆孩子撒谎。我真正想说的是：“我要开始搜集资料了”。这个背景调查，资料搜集的过程就好比篝火里的木头，是燃料，是原动力。一般而言真正写作的过程是很迅速的，对吧，特别是你来了感觉的时候，那些语句源源不断地从你内心深处迸发出来，可当你要坐下来，尝试着要和你想写的另一段时空里的某个人物，手牵手地对话、交流时，那个过程却要占用你很多很多时间。
即便有时候你研读的这些资料可能并不能真正给你创造什么有用的东西，那个时间仍然不算是被荒废。我记得有一次我在读一个退役士兵的日记，我记得那本书好像叫做《太平洋战争日记》，詹姆斯·查菲写的，他在一艘战舰上写的这本日记。你坐下来读她的时候，你知道这本书有300多页，里面的内容取之不尽，但你坐下来读她的意义，就在于你想要花时间去体悟，去寻找，去搜刮任何可能给你带来一线灵光，或者让你心升体悟之情的那个瞬间。在这个过程中，你会听见人们的内心的声音，他们的所思所想，他们对自我生命的感受..好的写作，其实从某种意义上讲就是“好的偷窃”，不断得搜寻人们已经说过，已经写下的那些语句，起码对我而言这个过程非常有趣，这是我创作最根本的动机，它非常耗时，但也意义非凡。
（注，如果读了下面原文，会了解到PTA之所以读这本战争日记，是为了《大师》这部影片的剧本创作，因为这部作品的灵感源自L.Ron Hubbard在1950年发展宣传科学教的真实经历。Hubbard在二战时期是一名海军。有些PTA的话我没有翻译出来，因为对于这里所要表达的内容意义不大。）
It’s more about how to tear away yourself from that research and start writing again you know I mean in some ways I feel like to say I was writing the film was just a way that I could lie to my girlfriend and my three kids like I’m writing but really you’re down there researching because…that is…that’s the kind of…it’s the logs on the fire…it’s the feul…it’s everything just because the writing part…it’s fast isn’t it…it kind of mostly you know and usually it’s pretty good the first couple times it comes out of you and you work a scene maybe sometimes it gets better sometimes it doesn’t but that time spent just trying to hold hands with another period or time trying to kind of get inside that mind of whatever land you’re writing about and the ways that things can lead you…
Even if they’re dead ends doesn’t matter…you know I mean just the time to read about soldiers and come back from the war and really even it was a great thing called the Pacific War Diary and James Chaffee…he kept diary on a battleship I mean you know that’s like a 300 page book and just to sit down and read that and reread…to read those experiences sort of go through that a wealth of material that we had about Dianetics and now we’re on her burden that kind of stuff I mean it’s just endless amount of stuff…To go through all that stuff is the reason to do this, the reason to do it was to spend that time looking for anything that might trigger an idea or some kind of compassion or something…so many letter to the editor people sort of writing into this thing and that’s where you could get stuff…you could find people’s voices find the way they were feeling about their life or their movement or whatever they were involved in and…good writing is stealing, and finding little things that people had written or said or navigating it and trying to get in and that is the fun I have to say…at least right now for me that is so much fun I get off on that…that’s what really floats my boat is being able to do that stuff…it’s time sucker but it’s for sure.
这一段PTA讲了剧本写作与写作的差别（也许是个悖论）——
有人教过我，我忘了在什么地方听到的，他说：“剧本写作根本就不是写作”。
听着，你不是在写一本小说，你只是在写那些最基本的元素，比如情境，比如地点，比如人物的动作，你写了这些东西基本上就应该足以交代这个情节了。把剩下的留给演员吧。
我觉得真正好的写作，应该属于那些写书人。剧本写作讲究的就是一个投资回报比，就是要准求精简，你要留空间给演员，给镜头，让他们去带着故事走。最好的就是你作为一个剧本创作者最后完全隐形。有许多演员告诉我，他们除了台词之外根本没兴趣读剧本上的其他内容，他们都不读，你写他干啥？
I mean I was taught, I don’t know where I learned this or who taught me but screenwriting is not real writing. It’s…come on you are not writing a book, you know, you are writing basics, the situation, where they are and what they’re doing should really say everything…and leave room for actor to do something you know…I was…I always felt like that was good screenwriting…good writing belongs in books…that screenwriting should be as…should be is absolutely as economic as possible so the filmmaking can take over so that an actor can take over, so that camera can take over you know…that it’s best it becomes invisible…I was friends with a lot of actors and they said you know they read..they’d say you know we don’t read any of that shit we just read what our lines are you know…
PTA讲述在他的创作中，那些满足自我幻想的部分。观众提问的大致内容是PTA认为在自己的作品中，真实经历与那些虚构内容各占多少比重，F.X.Feeney把原问题完善为“有哪些内容是为了让角色代替你把梦境变为现实的”，在这里他们主要围绕着There Will Be Blood的主人公Daniel Plainview展开讨论——
我记得我们有次在沙漠里拍摄，有个画面就是一辆火车从远处驶来，我们就站在那里，拿着摄像机…那个感觉就是你环顾四周，突然意识到这一切有多么不真实——你站在无垠的沙漠里，有一辆火车，火车上是开采油田的工人…你感觉那个瞬间纯粹就是在满足那些你在现实生活里根本不可能去做的事情。
当我们在洛杉矶码头的船上拍摄时，我也有相同的感受。你提着一台相机来回捣鼓，那种独一无二的体验本身就是一种满足感。那是一个男孩儿最原始的梦想，你觉得自己很幸运，能以电影为生，能用电影去做那些你根本不会做的事情。当然，对于你创作的那些人物而言，肯定你是希望他们有一部分能够折射出你真实人生的影子，越真切越好…
不知道我有过多少次对别人说：“我要半夜爬到你的房间里把你的喉咙给割开！”的冲动…我其实常常这样想。当然了，我并没有真的去做。（言外之意，在电影里就可以实现）
What I was thinking about more importantly was…there was moment I remember we were standing out in the middle of a desert and there’s a train coming down the tracks and there we are with this camera…and you sort of look around and you think this is fucking absurd you know…you are completely fulfilling some fantasy…you’re making a movie out in the desert with a train and guys and with these gear on…you think this is like wish fulfillment you know…
I felt the same way we were out on a boat in San Francisco Harbor…you’re tooling around you’ve got a movie camera and just the thrill of doing that…love having that experience now that portion of it is wish fulfillment…That’s the kind of joy that boy is thrill of doing this thing…so you feel so lucky to do it. But in terms of the characters I can only assume that you are funneling some part of you…wholeheartedly, I hope…into them and through them…so yeah…
How many times I wanted to say to somebody I’m gonna come into your room at the middle of the night and cut your fucking throat…I mean a lot you know. But I don’t.
来个小插曲，有观众问PTA他最想读哪一部电影的剧本——
我第一个想到的就是《成功的滋味》。我真希望那电影是出自我手。想象一下，在我的简历上写着这部电影的名字。你去我的IMDB页面，上面写着《成功的滋味》，写着《西北偏北》，写着《碧血金沙》，写着《电视台风云》，还有《低俗小说》…我可以花整晚的时间罗列这些片名…
（注：许多非常棒的创作者都提到过《成功的滋味》，我喜欢的喜剧作家，主持人Conan O’brian在一次和PTA老婆Maya的访谈中也提到过，说里面有上百句经典台词。其中，让他印象最深刻的，是有人问Tony Curtis饰演的角色——Did you get the job done? 他回答说：The cat’s in the bag, and the bag’s in the river）
First thing that came into my mind Sweet Smell of Success. I wish I wrote that. I could put…if I had that on my resume can you imagine…If Meyer…if I had my name and used to look it up on IMDB or something it’s a sweet smell success…North by Northwest most aren’t Ernest Lehman…Treasure Sierra Madre…Network I put that on my resume…Pulp Fiction I would put on my list I’d say I wrote that…I mean we could play this game all night it’s a great game…It’s like a drinking game or something…
再来段小插曲，PTA回答了一个很现实的问题——
问：我从你的分享里感觉你时常进入一种无意识写作状态，这种状态很像是史蒂芬·加汉（也是个编剧）所说的“秘密花园”状态，就是好的灵感会源源不断地向你扑来。不过我特别想问，你的前三部作品我都很喜欢，我第一遍看的时候就立刻爱上了，我感觉你对那些电影里面的人物充满了体恤和谅解之情，比如《木兰花》中的某些角色，简直精彩极了。不过你后面的三部作品我却要再看第二遍才能体会到其中的精彩之处，那么你最近的三部作品发生的这种转变，你自己有意识到吗？他们是有意为之还是无意识的？是不是最近的这三部作品，其实更多都是来自于你无意识创作出的结果？
答：问题开始变得越来越难懂了…
听着，当你在创作电影剧本的时候，一方面而言，没错，你是很荒唐地跟着感觉走，另一方面，你是在琢磨怎么能让这个本子拿到投资。很有可能在许多时候你所做的，就是希望你的下一个本子能够在自我感觉，与现实境况之间得以更好的平衡。很多时候在一个本子被创作出来，到它真正被搬到大荧幕上，这之间你要考虑的事情太多太多了。我不清楚影视行业是否真正能够允许我们彻底的无意识导演，或者无意识写作…
注：后面PTA用他和亚当·桑德勒拍摄的电影《私恋失调》为例，讲述了他在最近的这几部作品的创作中是如何寻找到一种新的拍摄方式，能够让自己在创作的过程中尽量协调那些来自外界的压力（应该指的是投资啊什么的），不过这里他说的语焉不详，没有上下文很难懂。按照我个人的理解，他其实就是在说，他自己并没有真正在最近的这三部作品里面采用所谓的“无意识创作”，而是他需要考虑到的方面越来越多了，而不仅仅是像最开始拍电影的时候，只想这个作品本身的内容，他要考虑钱，考虑怎么组织人们一起投入到电影的制作中，怎么获取市场的接受程度。
Q: Hi Paul, I get the sense that you create from a really unconscious place and it’s sort of the place that Stephen Gaghan calls like the magical garden where great shit gets handed to you for free and I’ve heard you talk about sort of um…like writing from the guy and I know you did the early morning kind of thing…but my question…and there’s a question here but I loved the first three films of yours and they come…there’s such empathy for your characters and humanity and some of the speeches in Magnolia are just amazing amazing stuff and I’m wondering the last three movies that I saw them…the first time I saw them it was like I had to see them a second time to really kind of get them whereas the first three movies that they went down smoothly and I was wondering…is it coming…is there you finding like it’s coming from a more…are you finding yourself in these…in these more recent movies like…is this making sense like it’s coming from a more unconscious place…like you know when you see 2001 for the first time it’s like what I just see and when you see it again you are like wow now I get it. So your last three movies have felt very much like that for me…I’m wondering if there was a shift that went on in your filmmaking that you’re aware of.
A: wow we’re getting more obtuse and more confusing…
Listen, when you talk about trusting your subconscious when you’re writing a film I mean part of it is completely fucking ridiculous and part of its completely you know…maybe some time all you’re trying to do for the next year is protect so the vast distance when your instinct wrote something down and what it means to actually try to get it financed…go get it together…get everybody out there shoot it shoot it some way…I mean there’s a it’s and get it into…by the time it reaches the theater that god you know between whatever your gut is doing and something else…your brains had a lot of time to kind of think about what’s going on and…so if I don’t how if the film business is the best place for that kind of intuitive filming…you know intuitive thinking to if you can do that it’s…but um….I guess to answer your question I feel like after…I feel like worth…punch drunk love when we made that film something seemed to feel…I don’t know…based on all the insecurities and kind of like panic around during the making of that film we kind of…I, we, the people that I work with was sort of emerged with like a newfound confidence and as funny as that sounds…just a different way of working a different way of feeling good about what you were doing or a confidence…that’s not to say that you get so confident that you don’t still get…you know…just stricken with bouts of confusion and depression but that’s okay you kinda know those things will change and you trust that they’ll change but that felt like a little bit kind of maybe…I don’t know…a different way of working him it kind of felt more us.
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